Dinesh Palipana on Overcoming Adversity and Redefining Success

In this powerful episode of The Quest for Success Podcast, we sit down with Dinesh Palipana, a lawyer-turned-doctor whose remarkable journey of resilience and reinvention has inspired many. After a life-altering accident that left him paralysed, Dinesh defied the odds, transitioning from law to medicine and becoming a leading advocate for disability rights and spinal cord research.

Dinesh shares his early life in Sri Lanka, the challenges he faced, and the unwavering support of his mother throughout his journey. He discusses the true meaning of success, emphasising the importance of finding purpose, mental health, and living without regrets. He also highlights the joy he finds in his work, the power of relationships, and his vision for advancements in spinal cord research.

This conversation is a testament to the power of humility, kindness, and perseverance—a must-listen for anyone seeking motivation, purpose, and a deeper understanding of success.

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Transcript

Dylan Pathirana (00:00.11)
you personally but unfortunately our timing didn't work right but definitely next time

Dinesh Palipana (00:07.543)
Sometime, yeah.

Dylan Pathirana (00:08.97)
Yeah. This is my son Dylan. Hey Dinesh, lovely to meet you. Yeah. And, so much looking forward to this, Yeah. And you just came after work.

Dinesh Palipana (00:11.255)
Okay? Me too.

Dinesh Palipana (00:21.407)
I was working evenings over the weekend and then I'm at Griffith University today right now in the office.

Dylan Pathirana (00:29.262)
So how much time we have if you...

Dinesh Palipana (00:33.091)
As long as you need.

Dylan Pathirana (00:34.758)
cool. Thank you so much. know, mean, Dylan was reading your book like few times. I mean, we all read, we all read your book. Like even my wife and daughter loved it. And show the book. Look at, look at the way he reads, like with lot of notes. So there's so much things that I'm going to let Dylan to run this. Cause yeah, and give him the chance to ask questions.

Dinesh Palipana (00:53.643)
man, thank you.

Dinesh Palipana (00:59.821)
Cool.

What I might do is we'll shut the window actually because there are ambulances and stuff that go past so that way it's less noise. Okay, let's do it.

Dylan Pathirana (01:09.454)
Great. Thank you.

Dylan Pathirana (01:18.382)
All right, sweet. We'll get underway. All right. Welcome back to the quest for success podcast. And thanks so much for tuning in once again today. I know I say this most weeks, but I am so incredibly excited for today's guests because today on the show we have Dinesh Palipana and he is a man of many, talents. There's so many things to list here. He's a doctor, he's a lawyer, he is a researcher. He's a disability advocate and

He's also the 2021 Queensland Australian of the Year. And he's also the author of this incredible book, Stronger, which Jam and I both read. it's, there's so many, so many key takeaways from that book. And so we're so excited to get him on the show today. So Dinesh, thank you so much for joining us.

Dinesh Palipana (02:05.951)
No thanks for having me I'm excited I've been looking forward to our chat

Dylan Pathirana (02:09.802)
Yeah, 10 months back, Dylan and I start talking about the podcast and we thought exactly what are we going to do? Like we want to bring some inspiration to other people. So we put together a list of people, believe it or not, you're on the top. So this took us 10 months to get here, but we are so glad to be here talking to you today, Dinesh. Yeah, yeah.

Dinesh Palipana (02:35.523)
I'm glad that we did. I'm on it.

Dylan Pathirana (02:38.52)
Dinesh, this whole podcast is about success, right? And trying to understand what it means to different people and then also the kind of core traits that build a successful life. And so before we get started unpacking your incredible journey, we really need to set the groundwork. And so I want to ask you, what does success mean to you?

Dinesh Palipana (03:00.003)
that's a difficult question. I think actually success, I feel like it took me a long time to find what that means to me. And for a long time in my life, I misunderstood what success is. So I thought that success was having a prestigious job. I thought that success was having a big house. I thought that success was having a nice car.

Is it a beautiful woman or what is it? But I was wrong for the longest time. And I think actually success is finding our purpose on this planet. What are we here to do? And I think that's important because there's the podcast and the series of books written by Simon Sinek, which start with why.

Dylan Pathirana (03:54.498)
Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (03:57.804)
So I think success is actually figuring out why am I here on this planet? Because if we find our why, then the rest just flows. So for me, success is that, finding the why.

Dylan Pathirana (04:14.382)
It's really, really deep and an interesting place. we're kind of want to dive a bit more deeper into that as we go. So I suppose for us to begin, we really need to paint a picture about your, your early life. And I think that's kind of where, you know, us as people are really, really formed. So can you take us back to your early childhood? Tell us a little bit about your, your upbringing and kind of that, that early stage of your life.

Dinesh Palipana (04:44.034)
I think the three of us chatting right now have a common thread going to our roots, was Sri Lanka. I lived there for the first 10 years of my life from 1984 to 1994. Were you born there, Dylan? Were you Okay.

Dylan Pathirana (04:49.016)
Yep.

Dylan Pathirana (05:04.322)
No, no, I was born here, but still got family over there. was born in 2001.

Dinesh Palipana (05:10.39)
Okay, so Jam, you would have had some memories of... Yeah, I think life was so hard for people in Sri Lanka during that time and there are still people that struggle. I grew up around that time. But it's interesting, know, like there was war and poverty and struggle, corruption, all of those things. But at the same time, I think...

Dylan Pathirana (05:13.482)
Absolutely yeah I came here 1990 yeah

Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (05:38.847)
The life that my parents gave me was really good. Like I have very good memories of Sri Lanka and I felt loved and cared for and I felt like I had everything. And that's probably what we all want as a kid, right? Just to be loved and to be cared for. So even though the environment was difficult, not just for me, but for many of us, I think I still had it pretty good.

10 years and then we moved to Australia and we moved around a bit and had the life of the new migrant starting from very little and we lived in Sydney for a little bit then we moved to Byron Bay and that's where I went to school and it was just a beautiful place to go to school. One of the most, I think where it might have been different for me

compared to perhaps other migrants from Sri Lanka is that we generally end up in a fairly conservative environment and Barambay is not conservative at all. So was a very free spirited town and that's what I grew up in when I was a kid. So I went to school there for a little while and then finished school in Brisbane for the last two years of my life where it was a lot more academic and focused.

So I think that that was the first 18 years that's how I became a man.

Dylan Pathirana (07:10.062)
Dinesh, you became a lawyer first and then you decided to change that into a doctor. Why is that? What made you decide?

Dinesh Palipana (07:20.64)
So I think that's where this conversation about what is success is important because those days I didn't really know what I was passionate about or what my why was. And so I associated success with a lot of different things like a good income and a nice car and a nice house and law was a means to get that those days anyway.

So I just thought it's a good job. It was prestigious and I thought that... So I wasn't really passionate about it at the time. So I went to law school and then I think if... One of the things about, I suppose, not knowing what our passions are is... And chasing the wrong things in life like money and status and...

materialistic things is I feel like it's a really slippery slope. So I fell into a bit of a spiral and then I became depressed and then I was in a very dark place in life. And again, I guess we're talking about threads from Sri Lanka. The doctor who was from Sri Lanka that I happened to start seeing

to help with the depression. And he inspired me to become a doctor myself. Because I saw what he did for me in that time and I thought, man, this is really something meaningful, the ability to heal someone. So that has actually become very purposeful for me and that's why I became a doctor. There was, yeah. No, no, go for it.

Dylan Pathirana (09:11.694)
There's a, sorry, you go. I was just gonna like follow up on that because there's a beautiful quote in the book. When you don't have a well-developed sense of self, it's natural to follow the flow of people around you. And I think that ties into exactly that point. Society is so big on money, fast cars, getting all the material things, but it sounds like there was a transition period there where you kind of realized, hey, that's...

maybe not it, and it was more about purpose.

Dinesh Palipana (09:44.157)
Yeah, and it's tricky, right? So even now, like even today, I turned 40 last year, I still have friends and colleagues and I know people who feel that success is buying the house, having the car, being married, having kids, you know, like what we're expected to do of society. And so

there have been a bunch of people who have hit this 40 year old milestone, who have done all these things or who have started doing all these things. But I think then they go, now what? Now what do I do for the next 40 years of my life? And then they realize actually, you know, I'm in a job that I hate, I'm in a marriage that I'm not happy in, I live in a house that I don't like and I don't feel successful.

So I think it's a very tricky thing to navigate, but that's the flow of society. That's what we live in, right? So I think we've got to be careful about what we associate success with.

Dylan Pathirana (10:56.782)
And do think it took that dark time, like that depressive episode for you to find that meaning? Like you had to go through the really tough time before you got to appreciate the what's on the other side.

Dinesh Palipana (11:10.12)
Yeah, yes. But you know, one of the interesting things about depression is that you ruminate a lot on death. And I was thinking a lot about death at the time because it's a very, like depression is a very, I mean, it's a negative experience, right? But I think depression is a good thing in a way. I read a book recently which

Dylan Pathirana (11:24.14)
Wow.

Dinesh Palipana (11:37.406)
talks about depression and said actually maybe it happens to people for a reason, for us to start thinking differently. So I used to think a lot about death and one of the things I start to realize is, okay, if I'm to live the next, I don't know how many years, but if I get to the end of my life, if I'm about to die, if I look back on my life, how would I want that to be? How will I feel like it's?

it's successful and actually there are certain philosophies which suggest that we should meditate on our death because it helps us look back at life. And so it was a really useful thing for me and then I realized, man, I'm not gonna care about all this junk that I've had, I'm actually gonna care about whether I've left this world a better place, whether I've made a positive impact on someone.

Those are the things that I'm going to care about. I'm going to care about the people that I loved. So none of this is actually going to matter and that's how I found what was meaningful to me and what was purposeful to me. And there is this beautiful poem which says, my barn having burnt down, I can finally see the moon. So I think sometimes we have to lose our barn.

to able to see what's important. So yeah, it was a really good thing that happened.

Dylan Pathirana (13:11.448)
So Dinesh, talking about losing, if you don't mind talking about this, at the age of 25, young man, I guess I can imagine full of life, you lost sort of everything in a second. Can you take us through that journey, if that's all right with you? We just want to understand what...

prospective change with that incident.

Dinesh Palipana (13:44.605)
Yeah, well, everything, right? Because I lost the use of my body as I knew it. becoming... Let's wait for that ambulance. I don't know if that sound is coming through. Yeah, so everything changed. I mean, I lost the use of my body as I knew it. I became paralyzed.

Dylan Pathirana (14:02.274)
No, that's okay.

Dinesh Palipana (14:12.061)
I lost the use of my fingers, lost, we lost everything. We lost our house, we lost, you know, my mom and dad split up. So all of these things that I had in my life were lost. And I didn't want to lose any of it, obviously. But sometimes these things are ripped away from us. I didn't even have clothes, you know, I didn't own,

a bunch of clothes, so they'd own a pair of shoes, like all of it was lost for a while. So it was hard and it was so hard because I also was in the hospital for eight months and in those eight months I used to watch my friends get on with their lives. Some of them got married, some of them graduated from university, some of them were buying houses and I was like so...

It was so hard So losing everything is not easy. It was it was the hardest experience that I've ever had to go through But actually after a couple of years after this happened Having nothing At one point it's the freest I've ever felt because and and we grew up in a country that I think has a

think the percentage is like 60 % Buddhist, right? So there's a large... Yeah. So in Buddhism, the Buddha teaches you that attachment is the way to suffering. And so we're attached to all this stuff. We're attached to it. And I thought about it, right? I thought about it at that point. I'm like, okay, I was attached to my car, but then I was thinking about...

Dylan Pathirana (15:42.19)
Sri Lanka more than that probably.

Dinesh Palipana (16:06.044)
Okay, I to service my car, I got to keep it clean, got to make the repayments, got to fill it up. And I was attached to my apartment at the time, I was like, okay, I to vacuum clean it, got to keep the furniture clean, got to pay the bills. I was attached to my clothes, I was attached to all these things. But then I lost it all, and suddenly I had nothing to worry about. There was no petrol, there was no rent, there was no nothing. And so you're free, like I was so free.

So it was very hard to let go of that because it's attachment, right? And attachment is a painful thing. But if we can get to the point where it's cut or is in my case, it was ripped away from me. Eventually, I felt so free. And when I got to that point where I was not attached to anything, except for my mum, to be honest, when I was not attached to anything, that was the opportunity to rebuild myself.

and I promised that I would become a better man. So that's what that journey was like.

Dylan Pathirana (17:15.329)
And, and you know, you were in, a car accident, which was no fault of your own, right? You hit an oil slick and just like that, your life changed. I was, I was reflecting on that and I was trying to think like how I would feel in that situation. And I just kept thinking, did you ever feel like, why me?

Dinesh Palipana (17:38.586)
Nah, I mean, I didn't because we've seen things in our lives. I'm sure Jam, you've seen violence in Sri Lanka, you've seen poverty. We've seen death during the war. I've seen things and thinking back to those things, I'm like, I mean, there've been a lot of people that have lost their lives or limbs or loved ones over the years and people still do, right? All you have to do is look at the Middle East or Ukraine or...

all sorts, like some parts of Africa. so I'm still, I had an accident in Australia where an ambulance was there in a few minutes. And so all things considered, I think I'm a lot luckier than many people still. So now I never thought why me.

Dylan Pathirana (18:28.686)
That's amazing to look at that way Dinesh. I know you explained that very clearly, your detail of accident in your book. I don't want to go through that detail again and talk about it, but it's kind of a... It's still, you know, 25 year old. I remember me, I mean, this is way back, many decades ago, 25 year old, losing small things.

I had an and I lost my front teeth. That was a big deal for me. I was just going out with this girl and losing front teeth. It was a big deal for me. I didn't want to go out. I feel like I don't want to live anymore. Were you in any stage that kind of feeling?

Dinesh Palipana (19:21.526)
No, and I think on that point, like for everyone, we're like a world within each of us. And I think for everyone, like losing a tooth is a big deal for someone and breaking a limb is a big deal for someone. Getting a cut is a big deal for someone. So I think each of us, we have problems that are a world.

And like it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do so it was so hard laying in hospital bed paralyzed. It was so hard coming back from it. But I think I just, I kept going like and some days it was just like, yes, this is hard and

but I'm just gonna keep moving and I don't know where, but I'll just keep moving.

Dylan Pathirana (20:25.582)
And after the accident, you went back to Sri Lanka. Any particular reason that you went back and stayed there for a while?

Dinesh Palipana (20:35.417)
One of the things was I didn't there were a number of reasons but One reason was I didn't want to face the world anymore. I hadn't actually been back to Sri Lanka for 15 years until that point But I didn't want to face the world here as I knew it so I thought in Sri Lanka no one would know me and I'd be anonymous and I could just be there

We also had family there, which, you know, again, fell apart after a few weeks. And we just, I don't me and my mom, we went back. So we just thought it would be an OK environment and actually wasn't planning to stay there that long. But it ended up being a couple of years. So there are a number of reasons for going back. But I think for me, one of the best things was

I could learn how to face the world again and I could learn how to rebuild my life again.

Dylan Pathirana (21:41.004)
And, you know, after the accident, spent quite a while in hospital, surrounded by other people. And you talk about in the book, it kind of gave you a sense of perspective as well, because you got to see what other people were going through. But I want to go back to kind of the point you mentioned before about death as well. You mentioned the book that you saw one of the people next to you, they went into a rest or something and then

minutes later, they weren't there anymore. And that kind of hit you pretty hard. And then going back to your, you know, depressive episode, thinking a lot about death. How do you think this whole experience has shaped your perspective on like the value of life?

Dinesh Palipana (22:25.017)
I love life. Like I love life. Every minute of it, every second of it. It is, I mean, it's a gift, right? We're here, this conversation, like we get to live in this world. We get to experience summer and winter and see the birds and see the sky. And it's a beautiful thing. Life is a beautiful thing. We get to love people. We get to have our parents and kids. We get to

These are amazing experiences. So life is really precious, but I know that I work in the emergency department now and we see how quickly life is taken away as well. It doesn't matter how old you are. It doesn't matter where you live. doesn't matter how much money you have. None of these things matter. But with one swipe of her hand, fate can take life.

away or whatever it might be. So I think I've come to learn that there's a sense of urgency to make the most of every day.

Dylan Pathirana (23:25.294)
Mm-hmm.

Dylan Pathirana (23:38.254)
And as part of that, you know, it's about being present, right? But what I find, especially, know, within myself and our generation being exposed to so much social media, it's like we're caught up in the what could be. Do you have any tips on kind of being more present?

Dinesh Palipana (23:57.995)
Yeah, many. I was reading one of the authors that I really admire is Ryan Holiday, who's written a series of books on stoicism. And they have titles like Ego is the Enemy, The Obstacle is the Way, Discipline is Destiny, Right Thing Right Now. So all these things have a place in my heart. And

He did an interview with think GQ or something that I read recently and they said, so what's next for you? What's your goal? And he said, I've come to learn that there's no point in having a goal. So I just do. And I think I thought back to my own life. So one of my closest friends, we went to school together. We're still friends today and I'm the godfather to his daughter.

So we've known each other for 20 something years now. And I remember when I was applying to get into medical school, so I was passed the exams and all this stuff and I was getting ready for the interview. And my friend was quite a philosophical guy and he has a lot of ideas around philosophy and things. we were chatting one day about how I'd approach this interview and this journey to getting to medical school and he said, okay, what you've got to do is,

you gotta have this goal, you wanna get into medical school and I want you to picture it in your head that you got into medical school, that you're there and you're happy and all this stuff. And he said, I want you to put it into a balloon and then I want you to picture it above your head, you're holding it with a string. And now I want you to let the string go and watch the balloon float away. And

It just taught me something, you know, I think, yeah, I guess we're gonna have a direction sometimes about where we're heading, we might have something we wanna do. But then we have that and we just let that go. And then we just start being present and doing the steps towards it.

Dinesh Palipana (26:13.724)
So, I think, yes, you can have a direction, but just do and be here, be here right now. We're so attached to our screens, right? I think it's horrifying watching what's happening. I've got friends now and I look over sometimes and just scrolling through, like, it doesn't even last a second.

couple of seconds and then scroll to the next thing. And if you ask someone, what did you see in the next, what did you see in the last minutes? They can't tell you, right? So I think we have to force ourselves to be actually present and to be still and to allow ourselves to think and to enjoy this world and to talk to people and to exchange ideas. So

It's something that we have to be quite intentional about too.

Dylan Pathirana (27:17.1)
Yeah, so Dinesh, going back to your medical school, right? So you had the accident when you were in first year of medical school?

Dinesh Palipana (27:27.893)
I was half way through, exactly.

Dylan Pathirana (27:30.06)
Alright. And then you had to take some time off. And then how do you manage to get that courage to go back and continue that?

Dinesh Palipana (27:41.269)
So this about living a life with no regrets. that's a part of everything that we've talked about in our conversation today. Because we've talked about success, we've talked about the value of life, we've talked about how life can be taken away from us at any time. But the other part of that is, do we want a life of regret? And it came down to the point where I was like, you know, I'm so passionate and I love this thing.

And I could let it go, right? I remember having conversations with friends and like, well, you're a lawyer anyway, so why don't you go practice law or why don't you do this one? And I thought about it to be honest, because it was like, you know, why would I want to go through this thing? It's what some one of my friends said. But then I thought, okay, let me think in 50 years time, if I look back at life, am I going to regret thinking, damn it, I should have just taken a shot?

We regret the shots that we don't take more than the shots we do take. So it was a matter of, actually I don't want to have any regrets. actually, I just want to try. And if I've made an attempt and failed, that's okay. But I won't be okay with not making an attempt at all. So that's really what it came down to, not wanting to have regrets.

Dylan Pathirana (29:11.35)
And this is a little bit of a change of pace, but throughout the book, one of the things that struck me a lot was the support from your mom. And there's one line where you're talking about something that your mom says often, which is helping one person might not change the world, but it might change it. will change their world. Right. And do you ever reflect on how she's changed your world?

Dinesh Palipana (29:40.126)
man yeah, I mean she is the biggest influence in my life. She's taught so many things. She's shaped me, she's been there for me and she's also a large part of my world. She has given me a really good world to live in and for that I'm always grateful. But you're right, and I don't have to look too far.

to see my biggest hero, which is my mom.

Dylan Pathirana (30:14.038)
And I imagine she must've had to give up a lot to support you through this journey because traveling back and forth between Australia and Sri Lanka, trying to hold down a job to provide for you. Is there ever enough words that you can say thank you to her?

Dinesh Palipana (30:37.051)
Nah, and that's only the surface of it, man. know, there's day out stuff that she still does for me every day. And we've been on this journey, like I've been her son for 40 years and there hasn't been a day where my mom has not done something for me or been there for me. So that kind of love and dedication is just so rare in this world today.

Dylan Pathirana (30:41.665)
Yeah.

Dylan Pathirana (30:51.341)
Yep.

Dinesh Palipana (31:04.692)
And I guess the only thing I try to do is just to honor her in the way I live and for the world to know that this is her son and hopefully be a good man and to do good things. But I try, you and that book is actually dedicated to her. Everything I do is dedicated to her, so hopefully that honors her.

Dylan Pathirana (31:32.748)
Yo, your mom must be so proud of you.

Dinesh Palipana (31:35.604)
I hope so. You know we have our moments. We still have our moments but no, I hope so.

Dylan Pathirana (31:38.99)
You

Dylan Pathirana (31:44.578)
Yeah so Dinesh I don't know this is a right question or right way to ask this but if you had an option if you get a chance to change everything and and choose your life would you do any any differently?

Dinesh Palipana (32:03.379)
Yeah, Jam, when this first happened, if you asked me this question like a week later or a few months later or maybe even a year or two later, if you said, you want to have your old life back? I would have said yes. And I would have done anything to have my old life back. And in fact, I remember counting days and I was thinking, okay, it's been six months and I'm still like this.

It's been nine months and I'm still like this. It's been 18 months and I'm still like this. But in 11 days, it'll be 15 years since this happened. And I wouldn't trade this journey for the world now. It's been hard, it's been challenging, but there've been people that have come across, that have come across, that have been a part of my life. There've been friends that I've made.

There's the relationship that I have with my mother and people around me and I think it's too high a price to pay for that up. And I wonder, you know, I wonder what kind of person I would have become if this hadn't happened to me. And like I think I was still a 25 year old that was, I found my path, I found

what I was passionate about, found the why, but I was still making mistakes. And I wonder where life would have gone if it hadn't forced me to really think about things, which is what this did.

Dylan Pathirana (33:45.582)
Do you often think that way or that doesn't really come to your mind?

Dinesh Palipana (33:51.28)
I just, I mean, moments of reflection, think, you know, what kind of person would I have become had this not happened to me? Because I also observe people around me sometimes and I have friends and colleagues who are profoundly unhappy with their lives. And I, you know, I'm happy, I'm grateful.

every day is a blessing and I feel really good so I wonder sometimes will I have become that way had this not happened I don't know

Dylan Pathirana (34:33.07)
And do think that's largely due in part to the amount of time you had to be able to sit and reflect on life? Because I feel like it's something, it maybe accelerated your maturity, right? You had so much time to think and reflect.

Dinesh Palipana (34:46.865)
Totally, and I read once that many a great thinker and leader has been made in prison. So one of the people that they mentioned was Malcolm X, who in this particular book, I actually think it was one of the Ryan Holiday books, I don't remember exactly, but he says that Malcolm X was like a, you he was almost a criminal before he went to jail like a thug.

Dylan Pathirana (34:57.251)
Yeah

Dylan Pathirana (35:13.827)
Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (35:14.853)
But in jail he read all this stuff and he said that's when he felt most free and he had the opportunity to reinvent himself. And he came out and was a different man. And there've been other people also who have had this forced period of time to think. And again, it's been said that sometimes we have to go out into the wilderness and be still.

to learn, I philosophically, That's why some people go on, you know, go on treks and go to, I have a friend actually, was, he was getting into drugs and he was spiraling out of control. And he said he realized he was spiraling out of control. So he went away to Nepal and he spent a year building schools there and just living a very

basic life and then he found himself and he came back and he started studying law and now he's a lawyer. But I think we need to go through these periods in the so-called wilderness to find ourselves and there were so many days and hours when I was just laying there staring at the ceiling or staring out the window with nothing except my mind. So it's good time to take stock of life and think.

Dylan Pathirana (36:39.694)
Mm.

Dinesh Palipana (36:42.961)
and think about the man that I wanted to be in. And one of my favorite books is The Count of Monte Cristo. And I think it's, if our listeners don't know the story, it's about a man who was starting to have everything and he was about to get married and he was becoming successful. But then some of his friends framed him for a crime and he was imprisoned on this island for number of years.

And on this island, he met a priest who was a prisoner as well, and the priest and him used to talk all the time and he sort of became this different man. And they started digging a tunnel to escape the prison. And the priest, he started to die before they could escape, but the priest told him where a treasure is. So escapes, finds this treasure, comes back and reinvents himself as the Count of Monte Cristo.

Dylan Pathirana (37:39.714)
You

Dinesh Palipana (37:41.366)
So I really like that whole idea that these times can give us the opportunity to reinvent ourselves and come out better. That's what I promised to do for myself, to come out a better man.

Dylan Pathirana (37:57.676)
Amazing. throughout that time, you mentioned quite a few times, you know, your friends in the book, you talk a lot about how those relationships changed and how people who thought were, you know, your really good friends after the incident, the relationship with them changed or degraded. Sometimes people just stop replying and didn't really want to know you. How did that, how did that feel?

Dinesh Palipana (38:30.693)
It was really hard because there some people that were really close to me or I thought were really close that fell away, they started treating me a bit differently, like a bit lesser as well. And especially when I came back to medical school, when some of my friends were more senior, they treated me differently as well.

you know, now that whole dynamic has completely changed again. And it's just interesting how people fluctuate during the years when you have nothing to when you've come back to having a life. But the thing that I have really valued and appreciated are the friends that have just been a constant throughout that time.

And there aren't many, I could probably say that there are just a few. It can count on two hands at the most, maybe one hand. And I think that, you know, I just love them so much and I'll do anything for them. And I guess it's taught me about loyalty as well, know, loyalty. Yeah, but it was so challenging to see that and it's hurtful, know, was painful.

Dylan Pathirana (39:44.002)
Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (39:53.124)
but maybe that's human nature sometimes.

Dylan Pathirana (39:56.202)
And, and it was even the case with some of your family members when you were back in Sri Lanka, trying to take advantage of the situation. Do you hold any resent for those people?

Dinesh Palipana (40:07.151)
There are family members that we've lost contact with after all that kind of stuff. There are family members that... And the funny thing is I think about this sometimes and I'm like, I actually don't have any feelings, positive or negative. So it's just like, I don't even have curiosity, which is really interesting.

One day if you know, is it is what's that all about? Right? Like I think I'm not like I'm completely ambivalent to it and I'm not sure why maybe I've just let that go completely. But no, I don't think there's any resentment.

Dylan Pathirana (40:57.176)
So Dinesh, now you inspire so many people just like me and Dylan and there's so many other people. Do you feel a weight of responsibility to always stay positive and continue to do this?

Dinesh Palipana (41:15.791)
I think I, so I feel like I've been afforded, many privileges and honors over the last number of years. and I think it is, it is a responsibility, but I think it's a really, it's a responsibility that I cherish and welcome and hold dear and I'm honored by. But I do feel that I, I do feel the need to conduct myself.

properly and to be a good person, especially after coming across kids over the years that have said, I came across someone last year who said, you inspired me to become a doctor or you inspired me to do this or that. And so it got me to think like, this is a...

serious responsibility and honor that I need to. So I've chosen to do many things like I don't drink alcohol, I don't smoke, I don't go to clubs, I don't do any of that kind of stuff because that's not the kind of example I want to set for kids. Even if it's one or even if it's two or even if it's three kids or other people, like I want to try and set a good example if that's the effect that I

have been privileged to have on someone. So yeah, I do try to conduct myself with that in mind all the time, with integrity and to treat people well. But I think it's a privilege.

Dylan Pathirana (43:00.014)
Do you have any of this?

Dinesh Palipana (43:01.902)
I think when you are doing things that you love like there's no... So this is another thing I think about now and this Christmas gone I was working over Christmas and I was doing some night shifts and so I spoke to a lot of people in their subsequent weeks and they're like oh that's so sad you were working over Christmas. I'm like I'm not sad actually I was super happy like you know I don't think

When you're doing things that you enjoy, like we all have choices, right? I'm not forced to work as a doctor. I'm not forced to go to work. I'm not forced to do anything. And there are people in this world that are forced to do stuff. There are people living in prison camps and there are people living in modern slavery. There are people that are forced to actually do stuff.

there's all kinds of slavery on this planet still. I actually have a friend who's an anti-slavery activist and she told me that slavery is more of a problem today than it ever has been in history. But I'll back check that, but this is what my friend told me. So here we are in Australia where we have free education, free healthcare, we have a lot of

Dylan Pathirana (44:15.298)
Really? Wow.

Dinesh Palipana (44:29.761)
lot of things and I'm not forced to do anything so I have choices. So what if I you know I think I choose to do things that I enjoy and again I'm lucky to be able to do that.

Dylan Pathirana (44:44.814)
But it may take a lot of your energy, right? Like, I mean, you're doing so many different things. I mean, we talked to many people and we mentioned about your name, even Dylan's mom, my wife, Michelle. And she's a special ed teacher for the last 30 years. And she said, I would love to have Dinesh come and talk to my kids. Right. So, I mean, that's what I'm saying. You know, like everybody, I mean, we've been

kind of talking to you, trying to get you to our podcast. Like I'm sure there's so much demand, right? Like, you know, it just exhausts in some capacity, right?

Dinesh Palipana (45:27.788)
feel it's the opposite actually, it energizes me. Yeah, and like, there are some, if I wanna have a day, like there'll be some days every few weeks where I just sleep and catch up on, you know, whatever. But no, I feel so lucky to be in this position in life. And I don't know when it'll end Jeremy, like, I don't know, like I don't know when it will end.

Dylan Pathirana (45:30.267)
wow. Okay.

Dylan Pathirana (45:53.997)
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dinesh Palipana (45:58.348)
And so, you know, I think I want to just make the most of that time. I don't know how much time any of us have left.

Dylan Pathirana (46:07.83)
Absolutely. Yeah, you got to enjoy the ride.

Dinesh Palipana (46:10.526)
Yeah, so I wonder, right? Like, when I get to that point, you know, if I die tomorrow, it's gonna be, okay, well, I spent this afternoon sleeping while I had a chat with... Like, easy choice, isn't it?

Dylan Pathirana (46:22.702)
You

Dylan Pathirana (46:27.916)
And I want to go to, you were talking a little bit about advocacy and I you're, you're quite a strong advocate for, rights for people with disabilities and you, you faced quite a lot of adversity, especially through that backend of, of medical school. You, you push for so many changes to help include you in that kind of process only to get to the end of it and then not be afforded a job.

And you were the only graduate out of that entire cohort that didn't get a job. So it was pretty clearly a reflection on, on what they thought your ability was. Do you, do you ever kind of look back on how many barriers that you've broken down?

Dinesh Palipana (47:16.332)
I like I am I've come to learn that humility is one of the most important things as well and so I am I try not to I Think of the journey and I think of the different things that I've had to take But I never really look at it as a I don't know. I don't know how to word this but I try and I remind myself

to that humility is the most important thing and while there's been barriers, yeah, I've just, I love that saying that the obstacle is the way. So I feel like they've paved the way for us to have this conversation today.

Dylan Pathirana (48:04.906)
And I suppose what drove you to break down those barriers? it, were you doing it for yourself or?

Dinesh Palipana (48:12.97)
Well, you only have one shot at life, right? You only have one chance at this life. Someone told me once, this is not a dress rehearsal, right? Life is happening right now. The truth. So knowing that, knowing that I've just got this one chance, that's why I just said, I've got to do everything I can to get the outcome that I want.

Dylan Pathirana (48:15.278)
Mm-hmm.

Dylan Pathirana (48:26.028)
Yep. I love that.

Dylan Pathirana (48:44.386)
And then you kind of shift your focus as well to spinal cord research. Can you tell us a little bit about what you're doing in that space?

Dinesh Palipana (48:53.118)
Well, we've put together some of the most promising research in spinal cord injury and that's a combination of electrical stimulation of the spine, thought control and virtual reality and drug therapy. So we put a combination of those things together because they had a lot of emerging evidence that it can be useful to repair paralysis in spinal cord injury and that we've put together a project. And again, it's been about

tipping away at it for many years. There's been a lot of blood, sweat and tears. And now we're running a study. We've got about 12 people in the study right now, but we're hoping that it'll be 20 to 40 people over the next couple of years. We're working towards reversing paralysis.

Dylan Pathirana (49:44.246)
And are you hopeful that one day in future it will be reversible?

Dinesh Palipana (49:49.707)
Hope is everything. think we gotta have hope, right? Like someone hoped that we could land on the moon. Someone hoped that we could build a light bulb. Someone hoped that we could have electric cars. Someone hoped all these things. So I think all human progress has been built on hopes and dreams. And yeah, I totally hope that we can, not because I hate my life currently.

Dylan Pathirana (49:51.36)
Yep.

Dylan Pathirana (50:18.21)
Yep.

Dinesh Palipana (50:18.878)
But because I think we try, right? Like we're not gonna, you why not? Like we're working on cures for cancer. We're working on cures for heart disease and all this stuff. So spinal cord injury is one of them. And that's in our effort to help better humanity.

Dylan Pathirana (50:39.95)
Dinesh, there's one other common thing between you and me, between us is we both went to Harvard. Right. And you went few years back and it's important that I share this because so many of my friends, Harvard mates are listening to this podcast. So you're, you're one of the very first quadriplegic students at Harvard.

Is that right?

Dinesh Palipana (51:10.782)
Yeah, so I only spent a short period of time there doing a clerkship in radiology at the medical school. But yeah, they told me that I was the first person with quadriplegia to attend as a visiting medical student. Yeah.

Dylan Pathirana (51:28.59)
Alright. Did you enjoy your time there?

Dinesh Palipana (51:32.061)
It's incredible. mean, you know, it's so intellectually stimulating. It's so collaborative and it's just mind blowing and there's so much history and also Boston is just incredible.

Dylan Pathirana (51:50.638)
Amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I know that was like a dream of yours before the accident as well. So was that kind of

a real joyous moment for you kind of getting getting over there and completing something that you weren't sure was going to even happen.

Dinesh Palipana (52:09.319)
Yeah, but it was also scary, like, and I didn't know how travel would work out with the spinal cord injury with my mom. So it was really scary. But no, it worked out really, really well. And it was so special. Actually talking about it just brings back some of the feelings from that time. It was so good.

Dylan Pathirana (52:36.726)
Yeah. And working as a doctor now, I imagine there's so much that you see and learn from your patients. Is there any like takeaways?

Dinesh Palipana (52:49.479)
Again, I think it's to remember that in our interactions with human beings, because I feel like working in the emergency department is a window into society at any given time. And for our interactions with people, it's often about the simple things like kindness and really listening to someone and, you know, medicine is, you can't treat the body without treating the soul.

Dylan Pathirana (53:19.405)
Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (53:20.232)
So I've learned that some of the best medicine is sometimes just listening to someone and actually understanding them. And that applies to all of our day-to-day interactions, whether you're a doctor or not. So I think those kind of simple things that we can do for our fellow human, I've learned. But also that everyone's problem is a big problem for them, and that's okay.

know, Jamie, we talking about the tooth before and that was a big problem. And so everyone has their own issues and it's a different size for all of them. And I think for us, it's not about judging them. And that's one of the biggest things I've learned as well. But there are a lot of other lessons, like it's reminded me to focus on the things that I can control and let go of the things that I can't.

Dylan Pathirana (53:53.005)
Mm-hmm.

Dylan Pathirana (54:02.978)
Mm-hmm.

Dinesh Palipana (54:15.464)
It's reminded me of how lucky I am sometimes. There's been emotional times, know, I've seen a lot of mums who are pregnant or sick and it's reminded me of my own mum a lot of the times. the luck of the parent. Yeah, so it's such a human...

Dylan Pathirana (54:30.904)
Yeah.

Dylan Pathirana (54:37.024)
Yeah. Yeah. So Dinesh, you're currently working at the emergency. So you've probably seen similar kind of situation like, you know, 15 years back, what happened to you and probably take your memory to that day. And maybe, maybe you're the best suited doctor to treat someone like that, right?

Dinesh Palipana (54:51.249)
Yeah.

Dinesh Palipana (55:02.577)
Honestly, I don't know, like, I mean, I remember that day when I've seen this stuff happen to people, I just think about how devastating it was. That day I feel for people, you know, like the fear, the uncertainty, the shock, the family, it's like a bomb being dropped. So yeah, I remember what it was like.

Dylan Pathirana (55:28.654)
And your book, your title Stronger. You had to think about that title?

Dinesh Palipana (55:40.647)
To be honest, I wanted to call it unparallelized, because that's how I feel in my life. I feel like I've become unparallelized rather than paralelized. But the publisher thought that that was too complex and wanted to draft a title. They pitched stronger to me out of many other options and I thought, okay, let's go with stronger.

Dylan Pathirana (55:44.308)
huh.

Dylan Pathirana (56:07.508)
It's more simpler, right? And do you believe you're much stronger now? Yeah. Yeah.

Dinesh Palipana (56:13.831)
Totally, yeah. Yeah, in the mind, Yeah, in many ways.

Dylan Pathirana (56:22.498)
And talking about purpose Dinesh, when you read that book, even us feel very strong. So you actually give us a purpose, reading through. This is why I'm telling you, you're such an inspiration to all of us. something that I forgot to mention, Naomi, which is the Dylan sister and my daughter,

She's actually a doctor as well, GP. so she went to medical school and you came and did a talk to the medical students. This is probably about eight years back. And she came, you know, one day after this session, she was saying, wow, you know, this Sri Lankan doctor, Sri Lankan porn doctor came and did this inspirational talks. She was in tears. So

Not just us, you're touching so many different people. So amazing. and we feel more stronger this afternoon talking to you. Yeah. And I suppose Dinesh, looking back on your journey, do you feel successful given that your definition of success was about finding purpose?

Dinesh Palipana (57:26.438)
thanks.

Dinesh Palipana (57:38.694)
do I feel successful? Man, that's a tough question too.

Dinesh Palipana (57:49.318)
I hope that I never feel successful because I success is a, I think life is the pursuit of excellence. I think life is the pursuit of becoming better. And the moment that I feel successful, I fear that I might stop. So I hope that I never feel successful.

Dylan Pathirana (58:18.478)
That's a very interesting take on it. I agree. And Dinesh, this has been an incredibly insightful conversation and I'm sure we could talk for hours on end. We should, right? Yeah, at some point we will. will. But throughout our conversation, I've been trying to jot down some of the key traits which I think have led to your successful life, at least from my perspective. And I'd like to share them with you.

The first one is you're an incredibly deep thinker. I feel like half of this conversation, I was thinking about the philosophy and it was very like a deep and well-rooted conversation. And it's clearly come from, you do a lot of introspection, you do a lot of thinking and you've really framed your viewpoint and you're very clear in your beliefs.

And I think that's, that's a really important thing because it stops you from being shifted by outside noise. Essentially, you know what, what you believe the second one is you don't take things for granted. and I think, know, given your experience that, that it makes a lot of sense, but it would have also been easy to kind of give up. And so the fact that you, you don't take these, this

kind of second opportunity that you've been given for granted and you're going on and doing all of these exceptional things and inspiring others I think is an incredible characteristic. The next one is you're an incredible communicator. Like whether it's through the book or the conversation we've had today, you're so good at storytelling and getting a point across very succinctly. And it's something I admire a lot about you and then something we're trying to improve on as well. And then the second last one is humility.

You mentioned it yourself. You try not to bask in the spotlight too much. I think, you know, being such an inspiration to a lot of people, it would be very easy to kind of soak in the glory and try and use it maybe for your benefit, but you're very humble and have that humility to.

Dylan Pathirana (01:00:41.358)
kind of take a step back and do things for the greater good, not just for yourself. And then the last one is positivity. And that smile hasn't wiped off your face this entire conversation. given what you've been through there, I imagine for most people would have been quite hard to stay positive, but you have and it's infectious. Let me tell you that. Yeah, to that list. mean, we can go on and on Dinesh, but your courage, man.

That's amazing. I mean, we all go through ups and downs, regardless of our situations, right? Having that courage and lift your game again and go again and doing things, know, how the world sees you, it's really, don't really care, right? You just keep moving, keep moving forward and doing things you love.

creating impact. That's amazing. And thank you so much for this conversation with us. We really enjoyed it. you know, we can't believe we went over our having this conversation, feel like it's awesome. Thank you so much.

Dinesh Palipana (01:01:55.863)
I'm on it. Thanks for the chat. I really enjoyed it. You guys are amazing.

Dylan Pathirana (01:02:00.822)
Yeah. Thanks Dinesh. And on that note, we'll wrap up there. If you've enjoyed today's episode, it would be incredible if you could like, subscribe or follow us on whichever platform you're listening to this on right now. And if you want to see more inspiring content, you can see all of our episodes over at our website, the quest for success podcast.com. And with that, we'll catch you guys in the next episode. Thanks for listening. Thank you, Dinesh. Hey, thank you so much. And make sure you put that, the,

Dinesh Palipana (01:02:23.363)
Thank you!

Dylan Pathirana (01:02:28.416)
notes, the book.

Dinesh Palipana (01:02:32.099)
Bye.